the sensation of life
The night is terrifying. In the dark and the solitude, in the chasm between the lighted bustle of the days, everything drops away and disappears in the depths. No identity left, given, assumed, or invented. No work. No significance. No ambition. No façade. Only being is left: this small, naked, freshly-minted mite of the Universe. … Continue reading The naked night
I've been thinking a lot about these words this week: This is what I have been thinking: for the most commonplace event to become an adventure, you must – and this is all that is necessary – start recounting it. This is what fools people: a man is always a teller of tales, he lives … Continue reading To live or to recount
Some people are fortunate enough to be overtaken by an experience they call God that is so clear and self-authenticating that no amount of argument to the contrary can really undermine that experience. Having once had the felt experience of God, they have both a yardstick and a lodestone for their slow, stumbling realisation that … Continue reading How to experience God
Dear One, I want you to enjoy your life. I want you to enjoy being alive. Life is full of beautiful and interesting things, and people, and places. There's far more here than you can ever possibly experience. Follow your curiosity. Let it be your guide. Do not worry about making mistakes.Do not worry about … Continue reading To you
I am sitting in my bedroom where I have a little prayer corner. It is early on Sunday morning. The children are still asleep. Although it is cold outside, I have the window cracked open. I am swaddled in a dressing gown. I am listening to the sounds: a wood pigeon's coo, a crow's caw, … Continue reading Self-improvement; not.
This week a body came for spiritual direction. She was reflecting upon busyness, upon the balance she was seeking in a life of service to God, with space for prayer and contemplation. Amongst other things, she draws and paints. She related an experience she'd had that morning. She had felt anxious about the amount of … Continue reading Service
When one enjoys consolation, let [her] consider how [she] will conduct [herself] during the time of ensuing desolation, and store up a supply of strength as defence against that day.He who enjoys consolation should take care to humble himself and lower himself as much as possible. Let him recall how little he is able to … Continue reading Living with life’s ups and downs
In recent years I have twice become deeply bitter about how I have been treated by others. I was certainly not without fault – and I was treated unjustly and with a lack of kindness that hurt deeply. In both situations I became angry, and the hurt and anger transmuted into resentment and bitterness… Resentment … Continue reading Embattled, not embittered
The whole thing boils down to this paradox: if you are going to be a hero then you must give a gift. If you are the average [person] you give your heroic gift to the society in which you live, and you give the gift that society specifies in advance. If you are an artist … Continue reading Renunciation
12 December 2015 I want to write about emptiness, loneliness, meaningless, and the apprehension of death. This is what I feel at the moment. But what to say? How to write about these feelings? I might say that there are days when I struggle with these feelings. There are days when I wonder what my … Continue reading Emptiness