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the sensation of life

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Category: God

Self-improvement; not.

I am sitting in my bedroom where I have a little prayer corner. It is early on Sunday morning. The children are still asleep. Although it is cold outside, I have the window cracked open. I am swaddled in a dressing gown. I am listening to the sounds: a wood pigeon's coo, a crow's caw, … Continue reading Self-improvement; not. →

Julian Maddock Being alive, God, Prayer, Present 7 Comments 20 March 201614 December 2019

Service

This week a body came for spiritual direction. She was reflecting upon busyness, upon the balance she was seeking in a life of service to God, with space for prayer and contemplation. Amongst other things, she draws and paints. She related an experience she'd had that morning. She had felt anxious about the amount of … Continue reading Service →

Julian Maddock God, vocation Leave a comment 13 March 201616 May 2020

Living with life’s ups and downs

When one enjoys consolation, let [her] consider how [she] will conduct [herself] during the time of ensuing desolation, and store up a supply of strength as defence against that day.He who enjoys consolation should take care to humble himself and lower himself as much as possible. Let him recall how little he is able to … Continue reading Living with life’s ups and downs →

Julian Maddock God Leave a comment 28 February 201614 December 2019

Repetition

In prayer, when I attend to this body, there are two things I do. I remember and invoke sensations of God's presence that I experienced in the past. (See Where to start?). Ignatius calls this repetition.I feel into this body and attend to the body's sensations. The body tells me what I need to know … Continue reading Repetition →

Julian Maddock Body, God, Present 6 Comments 17 January 20163 April 2020

The fear of God

I feel a little distant from You. I like to sit, to be quiet and still, to write, to ponder. I can do this without any memory of You, without reference to You. But I think You are inviting me into a deeper relationship. You are always present, so being fully present means being present … Continue reading The fear of God →

Julian Maddock God, Present 2 Comments 17 September 201514 December 2019

No need

Yesterday, I was asked what is meant by justification by faith. This is how I see it, though I am aware this differs from much, if not all, of what is written about this contentious subject. 'Justification' is a synonym for 'having worth'. 'Faith' is a synonym for 'trust'. Justification by faith – the assertion … Continue reading No need →

Julian Maddock God, Prayer 3 Comments 5 November 201414 December 2019

You

September 1969. I remember the first morning I walked into my classroom, 1D, at my all-boys secondary school, and met Mr Starling, the form teacher. I was excited to find he was also my chemistry teacher – the synchronicity of it. Already in love with chemistry, it was the one thing I was longing to … Continue reading You →

Julian Maddock God 7 Comments 13 October 201414 December 2019

What is the sensation of prayer? 10 steps to knowing God

How can you draw close to God when you are far from your own self? Grant, Lord, that I may know myself, that I may know thee.Augustine There is no deep knowing of God without a deep knowing of the self and no deep knowing of self without a deep knowing of God.Calvin, Institutes of … Continue reading What is the sensation of prayer? 10 steps to knowing God →

Julian Maddock God, Prayer 4 Comments 8 September 201414 December 2019

Evanescence (III)

3. St Anthony's Pool [Read parts I and II] It is early morning, Summer 1991, the gardens of a college-turned-retreat house on the western edge of London. The Heathrow-bound air-traffic screams deafeningly low overhead, heading for touch-down. I am praying beside a goldfish pond. I know that if I am still and patient the fish … Continue reading Evanescence (III) →

Julian Maddock Being alive, death, God, Prayer Leave a comment 25 August 201414 December 2019

R.T.F.Q.

The last thing [Howard Thurman] said before I left was probably the single most important bit of advice I ever got about being a man. "Sam," he said, "there are two questions a man must ask himself: The first is 'Where am I going?' and the second is 'Who will go with me?' If you … Continue reading R.T.F.Q. →

Julian Maddock God 2 Comments 21 July 201414 December 2019

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Praying Together

Since the first lockdown, I have been leading online prayer every week. I invite you to these prayer times on Zoom at 8.30 am every Monday and Wednesday. For more information, read “Praying together”.
Julian

Julian Maddock

Julian in hoodie with blue DM's

I offer spiritual direction, training, and supervision. I am also a writer. I am based in Upper Teesdale, Co. Durham and (occasionally) West London.

Through kindly attention to the sensations of this body you can connect into a process of ever-deepening immersion into the reality of God at the heart of life.

I write here primarily about:
  • God, and how to foster your relationship with God;
  • prayer, and how to pray; and
  • how attending to this body is prayer and a way to be present in the Presence.

Read more…

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A beginner’s guide

These links will give you a flavour of, and a way in to, what this body is all about:

  • Where to start?
  • Sitting
  • Starting at the bottom
  • Feeling into this body
  • Starting at the bottom (part 2)
  • Relax!
  • What is the senation of prayer? 10 steps to knowing God
  • The miracle of being nothing

Copyright

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